how do i quiet my voices?

Tomorrow is my "last day" of work... i'm going casual, but not sure when i'll be able to work again.

so many things to think about,
do i take in a couple kids?  i've already got people asking me to.

do i just spend some time with MY kids?

will i go crazy?

how do i stop worrying?

will money run out?

will Hubs be worked to the bone?

will my babes like being home and away from the other kids?

will my friendship with my boss still last?  will she resent me for leaving?  will we still talk as much as we did at work?

am i making the right choices?

will i do a good job raising my kids?

will they grow up to be good people?

is it really my fault if they don't?

why am i thinking that far ahead when i can't even decide about tomorrow?

broken bones update

So yesterday I was home on my lunch break and my phone rang.  It was dayhome lady, she said "Greyson hurt himself."  He was climbing on a crib trying to see Vi who they were just putting down for her nap...  This is something that he apparently does everyday they're there.  But this time when he was told to get down instead of climbing down nicely he jumped backwards, landing crouched down like a frog.  He then started crying and saying OWIE and HURTING RIGHT THERE... They thought he was maybe faking, since he's started doing that for attention, but when he wouldn't stand up on his leg, or stop crying they thought "oh shit, he's really hurt".  So they phoned me to come get him and get him checked out.

I took him to the hospital and daddy met me there.  It was very busy in the ER so the doc sent us in for xrays and would get to them when he could.  Once he found out there was possibly a fracture found on the xray he took really good care of us.  Side note, the doctors kid goes to the same day home as Grey and Vi:)

So now my boy has a cast from his toes to above his knee.  He is normally a VERY active little man, so this whole thing is making him SOOO mad.  He's learned today how to stand up holding onto the couch, and scoot around a little.  Last night was a little long, thanks to drugs it wasn't as painful for him as it could have been.

Everyone keeps telling me their stories about their broken limbs as a child and how it sucked, but everything got better.... All i can think of is, HOW am i going to go grocery shopping, HOW am i going to bathe him, WHAT can we do to occupy his time.... i know it's going to heal, but i want to take his pain away, and i want it better NOW....

I wish he didn't think he was spiderman!

 His jacket is on in this one, because he thought if he got to put his jacket on we would go home:)

Learning to stand

broken bones.

Greyson fell at daycare, and now he has a cast from his toes to above his knee...
i don't have much time right now, but i'll update later or tomorrow.

oh what a beautiful day

My boss is out for the week, her sister is ill and she had to go to help her out with her daughter.
A coworker called in sick.
Another coworkers children's daycares power and heat were broken, so she had to take the morning off. (there are only 7 people that work in our branch in the first place including office staff and myself)
It was -43 with the windchill this morning.
The van had a flat tire.
First thing I did at work was paper cut the knuckle on my middle finger.


Yes it was a wonderful day back after 4 days locked in the house with a sick boy...


cup half full thought: it could always be worse, it could always be worse, it could always be worse...

a brief update

Just bringing you up to date, not sure who YOU are.... not necessarily in any type of order:


-went back to work, full time
-kids went to a day home, part time and part time with daddy at home
-kids grow, and learn, and speak, and crawl, and push out teeth, and poop an uncountable amount of times
-my grandfather passed away
-my baby boy turned 2!
-christmas, at home, that's all i have to say
-snow snow snow, cold cold cold
-kids are sick again and again and again
-Vi choked at day home, day home lady gets out piece of plastic dropped by another hooligan they take care of:)
-Grey had croupe, pink eye, stomach flu.... oh the things we do as mothers, more on that later maybe
-got a new dish washer, couch, and paint for the living room... then realized with 2 little monsters, WHEN ARE WE GOING TO BE ABLE TO PAINT THE LIVING ROOM????
-decided that i need to be home with my children.  
-gave notice at work to finish the end of january, was talked into staying on "casual"
-cleaned up more vomit in one night than i ever want to in my life and there wasn't even a party.


That's pretty much all i can think about right now.  i think now that i'm going to be home more and want to focus on bettering my family; which includes bettering myself, i just may be on here more often.